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March 20, 2018

17 months

I am still in awe of how far my girls have come on the 13th of every month. Today marks 17 months since they decided to come so early. Life with two toddlers is a balancing act- literally. Are you giving them each the same amount of attention? Are you reacting to ones cries more than the other? Did you tell them both you love them equal times in a day? Not to mention the literal balancing act of holding two wriggling toddlers on your hips when they are feeling extra clingy. Being a mom of multiples, I need to work on balancing my mom time with me time. It’s even more challenging to squeeze in some me time when I start working as soon as the kiddos go to sleep and then go right to sleep after. So yes. Balance is a constant struggle.

17 months has brought with it a clingy stage. The past few days I have not been able to even walk across the room without someone (usually Isabelle) going into utter hysterics. She has to physically be attached to me, preferably in my arms or lap all. day. long.  It makes for a long day when they are both needing so much physical connection and when they have to share my lap…watch out! There has been pushing and shoving to be the only little lady in the lap. That’s new too. The pushing or pulling one sister off of whatever the other wants to be on. It’s usually Isabelle doing that too but Olivia has gotten in her fair share of shoves. Olivia has also found her yell. I get it when her sister steals a toy or book that she was playing with but now she will steal something from sister and when Isabelle takes it back—the screaming! She was such a sweet little peanut that we never let Isabelle take things from her and I think she counts on that now. Smarty pants! So personalities and sass are definitely showing this month. What’s killing me is the constant attachment. I sit with them all day, reading books and they hardly ever touch their toys or play independently. Is this a stage? I can’t wait to watch them play together or let me cook dinner. They do like to climb! Into laundry baskets, toy bins, kitchen pots…over the arms of couches and up onto the back of said couch to watch for Daddy out the window. They are fearless. I was able to put a bean bag on one side should they fall off but they would walk off the edge of anything without a second thought. Luckily they haven’t mastered getting up onto the couch on their own but I think those days are numbered.

So where are my busy toddlers this month? They are chatting up a storm! I love listening to their little voices babbling a mix of real words and toddler talk.

Mama, Dada, Cat, dog, owl, bear, baby,  ba (lamb), meow, rawr, more, ba (cup), all done, uh oh,  Minnie, hello, book- (Olivia says “but” Belles says “bup”), boot, toes, noes, ear, eye, up… and my favorite is “I love you!”

Isabelle calls Olivia Yaya which is adorable! She also started saying poop and telling me when she has gone.

Biggest development is the word NO. Oh boy do they know how to use no. Isabelle uses it to push limits. When she is doing something she knows I tell her no for…she will do it, look at me, wag her finger and say no with a sparkle in her mischievous eye. She will play with the word no. While riding her rocking bunny she will say “all done” we will then start helping her off and she will say no and slide back up. This will go on for minutes before you either pull her off or ignore her a few times.

Olivia uses no very forcefully. If you try to give her something that she doesn’t want she will say no and push your hand away. If she is really not happy with you she will flail while crying “no, no, no”. Oh the dramatics!

Sleep…I am getting sleep! Finally! I feel more human with sleep. I feel more like myself with sleep. I can handle two fresh toddlers with lots and lots of sleep.(and coffee)  I can’t wait for tax season to be over so that I can enjoy these new free hours at night and then go to sleep!!   Because I refuse to jinx myself again that is all I will say on the matter.

We have learned that Belles needs her routine. Mess with her routine and we have a squirmy kiddo in bed with us for the night. On nights where Hubby and I go out and she goes to bed late she is in bed with us. When the time changes…she is in bed with us.  If we stick to our routine, she sleeps just fine. So don’t mess with our routine!

It goes like this:

Dinner 5:30

Bath (every other night) 6:15 then they run around in just a hooded towel until 6:45

Jammies 6:50

Small sippy cup pf milk with dim lights in the living room:7:00

Brush teeth and Quiet snuggles until 7:30

Into cribs with their required stuffed animals (Isabelle has baby doll and owl, Olivia has bunny and cat)

We read a quick story or prayer, sing 2 songs, turn on their lullabies and off they go to dream land.

Meal times:

Both girls feel like they are gaining weight but I won’t know what they are up to until their 18 month appointment. They eat a good sized breakfast- usually a waffle  or omelet and fruit and lunch  PBJ, grilled cheese, yogurt with crackers etc…but often don’t eat much for dinner.  Their favorite food is Pizza and they are no longer obsessed with bananas. They do not like vegetables. Both girls are starting to eat with sporks or spoons. It’s messy and I am not sure they get much in their mouths but they often demand a spoon and refuse to use their fingers. I am struggling to get them to drink water. They only want milk. I would like to just give them milk at meals and water in between but they refuse the cup unless it looks like milk. I have to put just enough milk in to make it cloudy. They both are loving pouches. Their favorite is applesauce or yogurt. They ask for apple all day long.

The only other issue is Isabelle and pooping. It has always been an issue for her. I think she got my stomach issues poor girl. I thought going off of the soy would help but there are days where she will try for quite a while, screaming and struggling. It’s horrible. She needs me to pick her up and rub her back as she gets it out. Not to give TMI but they are huge and so hard! I am afraid something is going to tear trying to get it out. She is taking culturelle daily which used to do the trick. I have started giving her peaches for breakfast every single day and that kind of helps I think. But it is still a struggle and I hate that it hurts her. Anybody have any tips and tricks for this one?

Finally…the girls love Minnie Mouse. It’s adorable. They got a singing, Dancing Minnie for Christmas  and love to dance along with her. They glance at MickeyMouse Clubhouse when I have it on and yell, “Minnie!!!” when they see Mickey because he is dressed like their doll. In the show, Minnie is in pink rather than the red and white so they don’t make the connection. I see some Minnie related Easter Basket items in their future!!

Onto month 18! How will my peanuts be a year and a half next month? Time is flying!

 

 

March 7, 2018

Snowstorms and healthy choices

We are dwelling in the calm before the storm. Another snowstorm, maybe the biggest of the year is supposed to be moving in on the Northeast tomorrow morning. Anybody else over this winter? Maybe it’s just me but winter was so much more enjoyable when I was a kid… Now it means all kind of adulating rather than just enjoying a snow day and building a snowman. Shoveling, stocking up on milk for the girls, food for a few days, and fixing the flat tire on the truck so that Hubby can get to and from work safely. Laundry is being done (thanks hubs)  and we have wood for the woodstove should we lose power. All of our grown up ducks are in a row. But ugh, I really don’t want 12-18 inches of wet, heavy snow tomorrow. I don’t want to be stuck in the house. Hopefully this will be the last bit of winter weather this year!

With our FET only one cycle away I am making moves to ensure that I am as healthy as I can be to give our Frosty the best shot at sticking around. I finally scheduled my first acupuncture appointment for the week of my day 1. I figure if I can go once a week for a few weeks that will give me a good boost. I’m sure the acupuncturist will tell me I should have come sooner but with the girls I can’t find childcare for once a week. None of our parents are retired and I can only ask them to take a half day so many times. So that will have to do.

I’m also going to do a mini Whole 30ish round between now and my pregnancy test. Dropping carbs and most sugars. We did a Whole 30 round in January and I felt so much better without so much crap in my system.  If this is my last shot at another baby I am going to do everything I can to up my odds.

Apparently there is a nationwide shortage of Progesterone in oil. Figures. The alternative is 120 per vial and I need 3 vials to get to my Beta test. Worst case is that we have to pay that and my working will cover it. I opted to have them ship my patches and hold off on the progesterone for a few weeks hoping that it comes back in stock. The pharmacist says they have been told 4-6 weeks. Let’s hope it’s 4.

Hubby has been saying this FET will work for months now. He is 100% convinced that we are going to have a baby boy. His optimism is contagious. I have the nursery planned out, all sorts of cute boy outfits and accessories pinned on a secret board and a name picked out. While I like having such a positive attitude going into it, I worry about how I will feel should it not work. Despite having 2 beautiful daughters, I will be crushed if Frosty doesn’t take. Let’s face it, we went through 3 transfers to get the girls. This embryo is our lowest quality. What if we go through everything and it doesn’t thaw? That would be brutal. What if it’s a chemical again? Those are just all kinds of not fair. Or what if I miscarry later? Knowing this is our last attempt makes me feel more pressure. It’s so final should it not work. I don’t feel done having babies. Hubby is good with the two girls. It might take a lot of convincing to take further steps. I don’t want to go through another retrieval and end up with multiple embryos, I don’t think I just want to freeze my eggs because insurance doesn’t cover it and we just can’t swing that financial burden on one income. The only other option is going back to medicated cycles and timed intercourse. It’s an option.  I guess we will take this one step at a time and the next step is hunkering down and getting through this snow storm and keeping two toddlers (who have learned to say no) happy while maintaining my sanity! Wish me luck!

 

March 4, 2018

FET countdown

Our next step on our way to our April FET is done. I had my day 2 blood work this past week and got to chat with my favorite IVF nurse again. It is comforting to be back with the same doctors and nurses and only wish that they could be my caregivers all the way to delivery. She sent me all of the protocols and consent forms and called in my meds to the fertility pharmacy. I thought we were ready to go. I confirmed my order with the pharmacy and was slated to have it delivered with plenty of time to spare. So when I got a call today saying that my progesterone in oil is back-ordered I didn’t panic too badly. I don’t have to start injections until mid April so there is time to figure out a solution. The woman calling said that I could use an alternative oil but that would be 120 $ per vial. Oye. Hopefully this is the only bump in the road. I have to call my RE on Monday and discuss options…try another pharmacy, wait and see if they get it before I need it or go with the alternative (which Hubby is not going to love).

I am finding that gearing up for an FET after becoming parents is a new experience. I said to Hubby the night after my blood draw that if we didn’t have twin toddlers running around we would be giving the upcoming possible pregnancy a whole lot more thought and attention. We know it’s coming, we know it’s a huge deal for our family and we know that the days of patches and injections are approaching quickly. While we know all of this, life is hectic and we just don’t have the time to dwell on what we are embarking on.  On this note, I will need to address all of the people who either assume I am done after the girls or tell me that 2 is a good number and should be happy with them. I’m sure I can compose an entire post or two on the things people say and assume that drive me nuts, but I will say this, why should I not strive for the number of children I have always wanted and that Hubby and I envision 10 or 20 years down the road just because we have to conceive them in a different way? Would people be saying this to me if I had had the kids without a bit of a boost from science? I do know that we are so very lucky to have our girls, it wasn’t easy. But I want another. I think our family will feel complete with one more little soul in the mix. I look ahead and see 3 kids running around on a beach vacation, 3 high schoolers going here there and everywhere, 3 kids coming home from college with loads of laundry and 3 kids having families of their own and having them all come home for the holidays. I see 3. I long for 3. None of this means that I am any less grateful for my sweet baby girls. If anything, I am so enamored with them that I can’t wait to have another- I can’t wait to see what combination of Hubby and I this little Frosty will be.

On that note, the countdown is on. The last week of March will bring my first patches and if we stay on schedule, we are looking at a transfer on, or around my 33rd birthday. Fingers crossed for our little Frosty to thaw well and stick with us forever.

February 21, 2018

Life update

Life has been hectic lately. I keep wanting to sit down and write but I am either too tired, working or desperately trying to finish Hubby’s Valentine’s Day photo book (it’s still not done). I think I will just jump back into the blogging with a general update.

Work

I am definitely feeling like I bit off more than I can chew with the whole work gig. I am working for my Aunt doing uploading and data entry for her tax business. I do this mainly after the girls go to bed when all I want to do is crash myself. I tell myself it is only a few months of the year and the paycheck is helpful. I just feel like I work all day with two toddlers, make dinner, clean up dinner, do half of baths and bedtime and then I work before going to bed.  Not sure that taking this on this year was the best idea for my mental health but it’s what’s happening.

FET

Last week was my sonohysterogram. That’s a very long work for saline ultrasound. To be cleared for our next FET we needed to make sure I was healed from my c section and that my uterus is still in tip top shape. I took my 800 mg of ibuprofen and went by myself- I’m pretty sure that will be a big change from the first go round—hubby won’t be able to accompany me to every appointment. I waited half naked for 45 very cold minutes and prepared myself for the pain I felt with the dye test. I was pleasantly surprised to not be in any discomfort during the procedure. There was some decent cramping after but all is well and we are approved for an April FET if that is what we want. So on we go! In another few weeks I will go in for day 3 labs and then call for preapproval  and order meds. I also have to decide how I am going to go to regular acupuncture appointments and get that ball rolling.  We are less than 2 months away from beginning our last FET cycle. Yikes!

Sickness

The stomach bug has hit our house! Isabelle has some runny poop last week for a day or two and life moved on. 2 days ago, Olivia started with the same thing and we figured it would last 2 days and she would be right as rain. Nope…NOPE! Poor baby has been having liquid poop for 3 days now and is also vomiting. Last night was fun—I took her out of her high chair after dinner and she snuggled into my shoulder. I sat down with her on the couch for a little cuddle session and I thought she was just getting more comfortable when I was slammed with a volcano of vomit. In my hair, down my shirt and all over her. I am just glad I turned my head and shut my mouth. It was So. Much. Puke.  I had to try hard to stay nice and calm so as not to scare her or make her feel worse. All I could mutter was “help help help” to hubby, who witnessed the whole thing and has since reenacted it several times. There were no objections by him when I promptly got in the shower and left him with puke covered Livs. Luckily, she took aim at the living room floor today instead of Mommy. My hair still stinks.

Not only is Olivia battling the bug but Isabelle caught her cousins cold and she is one miserable babe when she has a cold. It hits her hard every single time and I am waiting for the ear infection that I am sure is in our near future. Hubby has also picked up the cold and I am fighting what I am sure is a combination of the two. Spring needs to be here now. I opened the windows just to let some germs out and fresh air in today. Luckily, today and tomorrow will be in the 60’s. We are running out to get some puddle stompers so that I can take the girls out in our soggy yard. We need to get out.

My girls

Finally….the girls are 16 months old and I love this age. They dance, they laugh and they play together. It’s magical. More and more words are emerging all the time. Mama and Dada are solid and they have added “cat, more, ba, all done, ball, bear, baby,  book (when Livs says book it sounds like but) meow, sis, boot, nose, hop, up, woof and no” . I am sure there are more that I am missing. Isabelle understands simple directions like go find your boots or get your jacket. She will retrieve objects  and go to her room when I say it’s time to change her diaper.

They both LOVE books and are enjoying animal sound books that they got for Valentine’s Day. They are showing attachment to particular toys too! Olivia sleeps with a cat that was mine as a child. She sleeps with it tucked under her arm and it is simply adorable. Isabelle has been sleeping with an owl that came with a book from her grandparents. Neither sleep with blankets or pillows yet but I did flip Isabelle’s mattress to the less firm side hoping it would help her sleep better. Not so much but she isn’t sleeping worse. They love their rocking bunny, having Daddy race them around in their shopping cart and Isabelle loves her baby dolls.

We have managed to take a few naps at home lately due to snow and Hubby taking the truck. We all crawl into Mommy and Daddy’s bed and the girls snooze for 2 hours while I watch HGTV which Hubby managed to add to our channels or read or sometimes I even get to cat nap myself. I love this time and if I should get pregnant this spring, I am sure this setup will be amazing.

That’s where we are, hoping we all are feeling better as soon as possible and that winter takes a hike.

 

January 28, 2018

Here we go again

The ball is officially rolling for the transfer of our last embryo, “Frosty”. The girls will be 18 months in April and that is the soonest our RE would transfer. They wanted 18 months to make sure I had healed after my C-section.  3 months to go. That’s an intense thought, especially when I look around at my messy house full of toys and spills and thrown food. Can I handle 3 under 3? I keep telling myself that one infant will be a different kind of challenge than two at once, given I will also have 2 busy toddlers—please be easier! There are days when starting over with sleepless nights and around the clock pumping seems daunting and I question whether it’s a good idea but at the end of each day I think of my third baby, made on the same day as his or her sisters, just waiting for us to come and get him. I want to be pregnant again, even go through delivery and recovery again. I hope it’s not as traumatic. I would love to slow down and pay closer attention to the birth and God willing, get to hold that baby right away! I want to snuggle that precious baby and see another combination of hubby and I.

So again…3 Months!

February brings a sonohysterogram –a saline ultrasound of my uterus. They say it isn’t as painful as the dye test but I have still been instructed to take a ton of ibuprofen before I go in. But we have our appointment booked and that is step 1.

March brings my day 3 blood work and officially getting on the schedule for April.

April is FET go time, probably closer to mid to end of month.

Then we wait and find out if we are going to be a family of 4 or 5 because chances are we will not go through another retrieval. Maybe we would try on our own, or do some medicated cycles but I don’t want to have extra embryos that we have to decide what to do with. I would probably want to try them all and we just can’t do 6 or 7 kids. Ha- no thanks!

I have to schedule some acupuncture appointments and figure out who I want to watch the kids at retrieval time as I don’t really want to tell everyone when this is happening. I also took it easy for a few days after each of my previous transfers and probably won’t be able to with this one. Logistics still need to be figured out with hubby.

Not transfer related, we are discussing plans in terms of either adding onto our house, building or buying. We probably can’t afford to do this for a few years but the planning is fun! I would love to add on where we are because we have done so much work and I only get more attached but we are between 2 wetland areas and mosquitos are pretty bad all summer.  Decisions decisions!

Finally, my two little ladies are getting pretty sassy! They are interacting all day long, stealing toys and screaming about it, pulling hair and tackling each other and getting into toddler predicaments all day long. Eating is getting easier and I feel good saying that Isabelle is NO LONGER ALLERGIC TO MILK PROTEIN!!!!! I am so excited about this and am so relieved that she won’t have to miss out on all of the dairy goodness that Hubby and I both enjoy!  She has been drinking whole milk for a full week now with no reaction.  I was able to take the girls outside today for the first time in months and it was so much fun! Much easier than having 2 crawlers who didn’t bat an eye when I said to come back. Now they at least pause and look at me before continuing on their way. I at least have a few seconds to catch up and snag them. This spring and summer is going to be a blast! Winter can be over any time now!

January 19, 2018

15 month physical

Today was our 15 month physical. These girls are changing constantly and I am starting to wish they would slow down a little bit but also can’t wait to see what they will learn next. Poor Olivia has been sick the New Years weekend but at that time, her ears were clear. After 3 weeks of a constant runny nose the poor girl has a double ear infection. Not only do her ears hurt but she also had diarrhea in the middle of the night but didn’t wake up- so she slept that way until 7:30 and has the worst diaper rash I have experienced. So we are giving her antibiotics twice a day and Motrin for the rash pain.

I went into the Pediatrician’s office with my typical list of questions including my two fickle eaters who are not gaining weight, actually I was concerned that Olivia is too skinny. While their weight gain has slowed down due to running all over creation and no longer having formula- both girls are looking good on their growth curves.

Second my list was Isabelle’s hair pulling. She pulls her own to self sooth but also pulls on her sisters hair and tackles her multiple times a day. We are to calmly tell her no but try not to give her the attention she is looking for. And boy, do we see this attention seeking! Hubby will say no to her and she will laugh. The more he tells her to stop, or the more sternly he speaks to her, the harder she laughs. We can try a time out, distracting with a toy etc. but unfortunately this is normal.

Both girls received one shot each because the second is delayed due to storms in the south. They will get that one when we go back in a month for a recheck of those ears.

We also got the go ahead to give the girls blankets and pillows in their cribs. I think we will hold off on this for a bit longer because they are sleeping well at the moment. Hubby says why mess with a good thing and he is also not sold that they are ready. To be honest, I’m not sure myself. I may turn over their mattresses the next time I change their sheets to the somewhat softer toddler side. How did the blanket and pillow transition go for those of you who have already done it?

Speaking of cribs and sleep, we switched to a new bedtime routine that is going well (knock on wood). We do dinner, baths every other night then jammies. I am slowly decreasing the amount of milk in their bottles, which they have on the couch and then it is into cribs at 7:30. We read a quick book, sing 2 songs and turn on their lullabies. So far so good and I am so happy about it! It is a routine that I can easily do myself if Hubby is working and there is a firm into bed time rather than whenever they fall asleep in our laps.

Isabelle:

23 lbs 11 ounces

30 inches

Words: Dada, Mama, more, ba (bottle),  mo (more),dis (this) bye bye, “t” (cat), Dog

Belles waves bye bye, nods her head yes if you ask her a question and is starting to follow simple directions like go get your boots or go to your room for a diaper change. She points to her head, belly and nose when asked. She mimics whatever we are doing—Hubby stomped his feet after coming in from the snow and now Isabelle stomps her feet whenever we come in the house. She will copy clapping, head tilts and any sounds we are making. It is hilarious. This girl laughs all the time and it seriously cracks us up. Oh and she gives kisses! Amazing.

Eating has been all over the place for my little bean. She had a few weeks, including when she was sick that she ate hardly anything. Then she would refuse to eat any meat and now I think we are finding a balance though she still refuses bananas which were a favorite for months. Food she doesn’t want ends up on the floor, along with her sippy cup. Her current favorites are yogurt, raspberries, applesauce muffins, ritz crackers, puffs and crispy grean bean snaps. We are also increasing dairy which is going well so far.

Olivia:

20 lbs 2 ounces

30 inches

Words: Dada, Mama, dog, woof woof, T (cat), bye bye,”s” (sister)  no and a whole lot of adorable babbling. This child has full out conversations with us with hand gestures and all though we have no idea what she is saying.

Olivia waves bye bye, points to her head and belly when asked, plays hide and seek, reads books by herself stacks cups and kisses followed by saying aww. She gives great hugs and snuggles right into your shoulder.

Eating has been challenging with a 3 week long cold. I can always count on yogurt being a hit but I think we are doing better. Our Bug is a carnivore for sure. We have to get a third piece of meat not rather than sharing ours with her.  Toast or waffles with peanut butter, Ritz crackers and raspberries are current go to foods. Veggies are not a big hit.

Mama update:

This mama still needs to get out of the house on a daily basis but I am enjoying being home with my girls more and more every day. I just started working from home doing basic tax data entry for my aunt. It feels pretty good to be doing something for an income. Hubby and I are doing a Whole 30ish eating plan. We tried the traditional whole 30 round but with the more than doubling of our grocery bill and the lack of my coffee we opted to still avoid carbs, dairy and most sugar and processed food for the rest of the round but adjust to fit our budget and give ourselves one coffee a day. Hubby has already lost 4 pounds and my jeans are fitting better. Finally, I am going to schedule the saline ultrasound of my uterus for February to get the ball rolling for an April FET. Yikes! I have so many emotions swirling around that will need to be discussed but I’ll save that for another day.

 

January 5, 2018

Four sick Cs and a snow storm

Happy 2018! Anyone else start off the new year with a sick baby? A sick baby is no fun…2 sick babies are downright draining. Add in a sick husband and then a sick me…is it 2019 yet?

So far, 2018 has consisted of:

One episode of vomiting

A rash due to sleeping in said vomit because we didn’t know until we picked up our sweet daughter in the morning that she had been sick

A 102.7 fever

2 calls to the on call doctor- one for fever and one for increased respiratory rate and wheezing

A night time trip to Rite Aid for Motrin and Vicks

A sick husband

2 separate trips to the doctors because of course ones fever didn’t start until the night after her sister’s appointment

2 sick babies sleeping in our bed

A double ear infection (Isabelle)

Using and inhaler to control wheezing in the daughter who didn’t originally need the inhaler (Olivia)

Horrible coughing

Constant runny noses

Two babies wanting Mommy’s lap all day long

Refusing to eat anything but yogurt- and that’s great for the mucus.

A GIANT SNOW STORM

And one really sick Mommy.

If you’re wondering, I definitely wrote that while humming the 12 Days of Christmas… Yeah, it’s been a doozy of a week. Luckily, Hubby took a Family Sick day on Tuesday to help me but I am flat out exhausted. I have never wished my kiddos would watch a movie, TV, a video on YouTube…Anything-  as much as I did this afternoon. Being trapped inside all day due to the foot of snow we got didn’t help. I need one night where I can actually get some sleep rather than holding a sick bambino while she sleeps in bed with us. Is it spring yet?

To top all of this off, my snuggle bug Isabelle who was all about Mommy only the past few days (which I enjoyed because usually they both want Daddy) started fussing like I have never seen while I was giving them their bedtime bottles. She refused her bottle and squirmed and screamed until I put her on the couch next to me. She fussed for a few minutes before stretching out and falling asleep. It was the first time that my baby didn’t want to be held while she fell asleep. Maybe this is a  good thing because we are going to eliminate bedtime bottles and start a new routine without holding them to sleep but wow, that one hurt my heart.

Here’s to hoping that 2018 starts taking a turn for the better and the healthier because this week has just done me in.

December 30, 2017

2017 Reflection

I don’t know about you all, but I’m exhausted! Christmas celebrations just did me in this year! Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed celebrating the girls second Christmas- which was much more enjoyable than the first when we were sleep deprived new parents—but 4 Christmas celebrations made me want to crawl under some blankets with my little family of four and hibernate for the next few weeks.  We kicked off our Christmases the weekend before with Hubby’s Dad, stepmom, grandparents and his brothers family. Christmas Eve found us at his Aunts for the traditional loud Portuguese family and way to much food. Christmas Day brought us to my Mom and her side of the family and on December 26th, we hosted our traditional German Christmas with my Dad’s side of the family, which included my stepmom, brother’s family, aunt and 2 new stepsisters.  The girls were showered with gifts from Santa and our house feels like it is bursting with new belongings. Hubby and I both found it exhausting to let the girls play in unbabyproofed houses. They both made beelines for the ceramic carolers that were the same height as they were…as well as the 2 foot tall Santa in the bathroom and they just had to venture into every open door in the house (and they were all open).  Unlike last year, we couldn’t just pass around our tiny newborns for snuggles all night. People were less willing to hold two wiggly toddlers. I was slightly disappointed that his mom didn’t bring anything for the girls because she thought we were going to see her on Christmas Day….We haven’t done that for 3 years now so I’m not sure where she got that idea. That just means that this Sunday we will celebrate our 5th Christmas celebration at her house….oye.  Part of me is looking forward to laying our Christmas tree to rest in the Christmas tree graveyard, aka our back woods alongside all of our Christmas trees from the past.  I’m ready to have some more space in our living room and try to organize all of the new toys.

With Christmas behind us, I am looking forward to a new year but have been doing my share of reflecting on the past 12 months.  A year ago we had two tiny peanuts who needed to be walked constantly and fed every three hours and wow, pumping….I almost forgot that I even did that for months to no avail.  12 months ago our marriage was struggling under the pressure of two newborns and very little sleep. Nobody can prepare you for caring for multiples, it’s hard. In the spring I decided to leave my career to raise our girls. We have had to learn to budget and Hubby has been working overtime every week. It has been a big year for us, one full of changes. But the biggest changes are in our daughters. In the past year they have learned to smile and coo. They have learned to roll over, then sit up and now walk. They have taken baby food, mastered finger foods and now are beginning to use spoons. They have gone from 6 bottles a day to 3 meals, 2 snacks and sippy cups. They laugh and play peek a boo, they steal toys from one another and wave bye bye , they clap their hands, know where their heads and bellies are and give kisses.  They say Dada, the occasional mama, “t” for cat and ba for bear or cup. Isabelle signs milk and more and is starting to actually say “mo”. She runs away after bath time so that Daddy can chase her down the hall. Olivia says aww, wow, and doggie woof woof and talks up a storm in her booster seat.  She is so gentle and loves animals. All of that change in 12 months! I can’t even imagine what I will be writing next year, especially as we gear up to transfer our last embryo in the spring.

As we close out this year we are all sick and it is downright frigid outside, but I am thankful that we are all happy. Our house is filled with the sounds of squealing children and little feet running down the hallway. These are sounds I used to dream about.  So from our family to yours, have a very happy New Year!

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November 16, 2017

13 month update

Hello 13 months!  We have officially entered toddler hood! Whether you consider the switch from baby to toddler to be their first birthday or when they are walking, we have met both standards. We have two toddlers walking all over this house and finding all kinds of trouble to get into.  Life is crazy in our little house!

Let’s talk for a minute about having two mobile little girls… it is hilarious! Watching those slightly bowed little legs go from taking those first tentative, wobbly steps to now getting from one end of the hallway to the other without a stumble is pretty awesome. Miss Olivia is gaining speed with every passing minute and may be running by noon tomorrow. Okay, maybe a few more weeks but this girl moves fast!  Isabelle is still in the tentative stage but while it may take her longer to cross a room, she does it just fine. My girls are walking and my, how things have changed. There are so many things that I can’t do now that I could only a few weeks ago. …unloading the dishwasher for example, now I am lucky if I get a glass or two out before I have a child, usually Olivia literally climbing into the dishwasher. I swear, they hear that dishwasher open and they come walking at full toddler speed. It takes me all day to unload the dishes unless I remember to do it while they are in their highchairs.  Putting their laundry away is another no can do with toddlers. I put the nicely folded pants into the drawer and turn to the side for the next article of clothing and when I turn back not only is that newly folded pair of pants on the floor but so are about 5 others.  They are just so fast now and no longer stay occupied in one spot with a toy. I tend to let this go on and let them have fun for a few minutes before shoving all of the strewn clothing back into drawers (not folded anymore) and closing their door behind us.  Sadly, I open the door later and remember that even though clothes are shoved back into place, they got into the diapers and book bin while I did so and it looks like a bomb went off.

Onto food…

Olivia is still not bringing food to her mouth or drinking from a sippy cup. She will however, drink her bottle on her own. I’ve tried so many kinds of sippy cups and she will bring them up but try to suck on it like a nipple. At least she will eat when I feed her and we have discovered that she loves dairy…ice cream, yogurt, cottage cheese, you get the drift. We also discovered that both girls like chicken parm (Isabelle’s without cheese).

Isabelle is a champ and usually feeds herself…and feeds herself and feeds herself. We have to really watch that she doesn’t end up with so much in her mouth that she looks like a chipmunk. This doesn’t help my fear of them choking. This girl is also addicted to puffs and cheerios.

I feel like I am failing when it comes to transitioning to actual meals and eliminating bottles. This week I bit the bullet and gave up our morning bottle. I am mourning the loss of that one because it gave us all time to snuggle and wake up. But if the goal is to be off of formula by Christmas I had to change our schedule. We now go right to breakfast in highchairs around 7:30. Yogurt, cheerios, eggs, toast, pancakes or something similar is usually accompanied by a pureed fruit or chunks of banana. Then we play play play and have a 6 oz milk or soy milk  bottle around 10 for naps. Lunch of leftovers or pb toast, yogurt with a diced veggie around 12 or 1. 4-6 ounce bottle at 3ish –sometimes I do half formula depending on how much they had for lunch. Snack around 3 and dinner at 5 which is usually whatever we are eating . Finally, I do a full formula 8 ounce bottle at bedtime.

So here are my problems,

  • feeling confident that they are getting enough solid food to compensate for a bottle

 

  • knowing what size pieces they can now handle. I am still dicing to pea size. Meals take forever when I literally feed them a chicken tender in pea sized pieces. Help! Why don’t they publish a book about all of this important information? Maybe they do but I am too tired to google it.

 

  • If they won’t drink consistently from their sippy cups, how do I eliminate bottles? Anybody?

Talking? Not really, which I guess is okay because their adjusted age is 11 months…so it’s coming soon I would imagine. They both babble all day long and I love listening to it. They do the mamama, dadadada, blabababa and uh ohhhh  .

Sleeping;

What’s that? Will we ever sleep a full night again? Our current situation is that we all have colds. Isabelle seems to get hit harder with all illnesses and with her coughing and congestion I wasn’t going to do any kind of cry it out with her so guess where she is? In bed with me. And I kind of don’t mind. Our new bed has helped with my hip pain and so staying in one position all night is working out okay. During this time we have let Olivia fuss more without the fear of waking her sister. This has gone well and she usually…I say usually because I am not willing to say or think that this is a done deal….can fall back to sleep.  Isabelle is sleeping great with me but I know we have to transition her back to her crib when she is better and that is going to be challenging to say the least. The poor girl just stands up and wails as soon as she hits the bed no matter how deeply she was sleeping prior. I would just sleep with her but then I feel guilty that I don’t let her sister do the same. Sigh…we will all sleep in our own beds someday, right? For the whole night…right?

Odds and Ends

Isabelle or Belles, or Bellie Boo can clap, wave, high five, blow half of a kiss—by this I mean she got the part where she brings her hand to her face so when I say blow kiss she pretty much just smacks herself in the face. It’s cute. She also loves to smack her belly when is shirtless and is starting to dance. We are working on being gentle, especially with her sister, specifically pulling hair and tackling. I tell her no and she laughs at me and does it harder. I tell her no and move her away to another toy and she races her little behind back to her sister to tackle her again. I’ve got my work cut out for me with her. She loves books, often reading the same one a million times a day, and baths and being naked. There is nothing like naked babies walking around after bath time. Adorable.

 

Olivia, Livy, Livs or Bug is starting to wave hello and goodbye, shakes her head no without really meaning no. She loves to copy Isabelle when she does this so I have double shaking heads. She likes to make fishy faces and make noises with her mouth. She crinkles her nose when she smiles and she is smiling and laughing a whole lot more lately. Olivia loves her stuffed bunny and is starting to climb. Lord, help me. I can see this kid swinging from the ceiling in the coming days. Olivia also loves walking, she is so excited to practice all day long and her face just lights up when you tell her how well she is doing. She does fall at times and does one of two things…hits the ground on all fours and immediately takes off at a lightning speed crawl to her final destination or quickly finds a wall to stand up against and keeps on trucking. Finally, Olivia is a hard core Daddy’s girl right now. If Daddy is home she is glued to him. If Daddy leaves she wails until I distract her with food. She will knock on the door of whatever room he is in and attach herself to his pants leg if he is not playing with her or holding her. Mommy is chopped liver if Daddy is home. It’s not like I take care of you all day and night or anything. Geesh!

So there you have it! Lots going on at 13 months. They are starting to play independently and I love that they enjoy being read to. I definitely see the transition into toddlers happening more and more every day. They are developing such different personalities and preferences. I can’t wait to decorate for Christmas and get our tree all together! Last year they were still too tiny to go. I can’t wait to hang their little mini stockings and see their reaction to all of the lights and ornaments on the tree….behind the gate of course.  Here’s to their second holiday season!

 

November 12, 2017

Moms don’t get sick days

Have you seen those commercials, the ones where moms and dads walk into their kids rooms and say they are taking a sick day only to realize that parents don’t get sick days? Yeah… I had that moment today.  I found myself thinking back to the days where I went to work, more specifically, the bank of sick days that I could take for the flu or a cold or some particularly painful cramps. I would request my substitute, send in my lesson plans and crawl under some blankets on the couch for a full day of rest and recuperation. This usually involved some macaroni and cheese, maybe some hot chocolate and Hallmark movies. (Hallmark movies seem to be a recurring theme for me lately) Remember those days?

I was so lucky to not get more than a sniffle last cold and flu season, when my girls were brand new. I managed to fend off many a cold prior to their arrival because I had built up a decent immune system as a teacher. But not this time. Yesterday I started to feel the onset of my first Mommy cold. How is a mommy cold different than a regular cold you might ask? Well for starters, there is no rest, no relaxation, no time to make mac and cheese or hot chocolate and no substitute to call in.  Life goes on and you have no choice but to keep up despite the room spinning around you.

To make matter worse, I was not the only one sick in our house. On Wednesday, Isabelle started coughing. She seems to be more susceptible to colds and respiratory issues than her sister. Her cough quickly became wet and you could hear the congestion in her chest when you weren’t trying to oh so gently wipe her run away nose. My poop girl just needed mommy snuggles that day and I let her take a few more naps than normal. I’m not sure where she caught the germs but Olivia seems to also have been exposed and has developed a cough, though not as bad. I hate when my girls are sick but if I have to find a silver lining it is the snuggles. If I can make them feel better just by comforting them with snuggles, I will do it all day and night…and I do. Isabelle has been sleeping with me since Wednesday. The down side to this? I am destined to get whatever it is they have caught. And so, all three of us are sick.

We all got up this morning and Hubby didn’t think “oh, the wife is sick, I should get the girls changed and fed and let her have a few extra minutes of much needed sleep”. Nope, he thought, “well I don’t get to sleep in so she doesn’t either”. So yeah, I fought the foggy head and sore throat and we all got up.  I fed the girls while he read a magazine and then he asked me when I was making breakfast.  So sore throat and all I made the girls scrambled eggs and toast, Hubby got an omelet, toast and coffee  and finally I got myself some eggs…while he read a magazine…  We then fed the girls as we ate and then I cleaned up…while he…can you finish my sentence yet? Yeah, he read his magazine.  Sigh…. We played and I got them dressed and made sure nobody was running a fever and then it was nap time. So again, I made bottles and fed the girls while Hubby READ A FREAKING MAGAZINE. Luckily  I snuck in a 30 minute nap with the girls on the couch. Could have slept longer. Would have been nice if hubs offered to feed them and let me actually lay down sans kids for a nap. Really, I just don’t think these things even occur to him.  The rest of the day went similarly, with a building headache, I played with the girls, fed them lunch and soothed Miss Olivia who cried every time Daddy came in and went back outside to work on a project because she is a hard core Daddy’s girl and hates when he leaves her.  I didn’t feel one bit guilty when I loaded the ladies up in the truck for our afternoon drive for coffee, and not Dunkin…we went to Starbucks. They are having a buy one get one Holiday drink deal so you better believe I am taking advantage of that one while it lasts. I was nice enough to give Hubby the extra drink while he worked in the cold. But come Monday, the last day of the deal, they are both mine.  We ended the day with me making dinner, cleaning up dinner- finally, a nice hot shower and 2 fussy babies getting ready for bed.

I am currently in bed at 8:30 with a sleeping Belles next to me because she refuses to be put down in her crib. For those of you who co sleep, do you still sleep with your babe in your arm or do you let them just sleep next to you? Can’t wait for the day that they can just crawl in between us and we can all sleep in our own comfortable positions. On the plus side, I haven’t had hip pain since getting our new bed. Now, I think I will finish watching Wonder Woman and maybe do some Amazon Christmas browsing for the girls because all 4 sets of grandparents must be told different things to get.

So lesson learned today… While nobody deserves sick days like moms…Moms don’t get sick days…

Wishing you all a healthy cold and flu season!